Saturday, October 29, 2005


So, I'm filming a really corny short video in one hour. It's my first. I'm nervous and excited and I don't know why. Trying to get people for this video and trying to find time to film has been a pain in the butt. I'm sure I'm not going to like the finished product, but at least I'll have fun being the director and saying things like, "cut!" & "action!" Haha. I'm just kidding, but I should do it just for fun and because the video is corny. I wish I were funny then my film would be a humorous one, but it's not. It's pretty emo. I've been listening to a lot of emo music lately. I love Mae, but I should probably give up that secular Fall Out Boy.

Anyway yea I need to get ready to go meet my actors. My actors! Aaaah! Haha! That's great.

Friday, October 21, 2005

Temporarily Unemployed

My money running out like some cheating husband. - LAS

It's so crazy how little one can do when they don't have any money. My financial situation has been pretty low since I had to quit my job, because school started back up again. I've been invited to "hang out" with several of my friends and go to the movies, see a play, go bowling, eat out at a restaurant and I've had to refuse countless times, because of my lack of funds. I have a small work study job, but it's just not cutting it. I just recently received two credit cards in the mail and how tempting they are! I've only used one, but it was on purchases that I knew I would be able to pay off in the next week or so. I don't want to be consumed with credit card debt when I am already smothered in debt from loans I've had to take out for school.

I am on a search for a new job. The Christmas season will be starting soon and I would like to work during the time that I am out of school on break. I would prefer the job to have late hours so that I could stay after the Christmas break when school begins again.

It's a hard tasks finding a job and I've forgotten just how hard it is. Every job I've had before was practically given to me. I didn't have to do much as far as searching goes. I always knew someone who was looking to hire, so getting a job came very easy for me. Now I have to think of places where I would like to work that have a pleasant environment, are within a reasonable driving distance and have flexible hours.

Honestly, I'm feeling quite lazy about this search and I have so many other things I need to do. So, it's going to take some motivation on my part. Also, I have to stop being picky about where I work. So far I've filled out two applications from different companies and I have returned only one. Yes, I need to get moving otherwise all of the available jobs that are looking for holiday workers will be gone and I can't have that.

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Starting Over

I closed down my website. It's the end of something I do not feel like doing anymore. Someday I'll return with a new domain name, but until then it's gone. I never thought I'd ever do it, but today I was sitting here thinking how I just want to walk away from it. So, I did.

I'll continue to blog here and occasionally at xanga for now.

I've been trying to work on my screenplay. Actually I've been sitting here trying to write something, anything, but it's as if my brain has been cleaned of all creativity. I've never felt this "dead" before. I can't stay focused for not even a few minutes. I think it's because I have so much work to do and I'm dreading it all. I'm anticipating the end of the semester and the beginning of the next. I've already planned out my last semester of college and it's going to be one that is easy. I hope.

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

This is the countdown

I have a knack for finding aesthetic blog templates, don't I? I'm at work and I really have nothing to do except surf the internet and wait for time to pass. I'm consumed with boredom I can't even write or focus long enough to study. I wish I could study when it's quiet. During the moments that everything is still is when all of the sounds that usually go unnoticed become a deafening loudness. The low buzz of the soda machine in the hallway combined with the hum of the mini heater behind me sounds like the rumbling of a washing machine. It's such a distraction or maybe I'm just easily distracted, either way I'm not getting any work done here. Even the ticking of my watch is like the sound of someone tapping a pen on a desk. So, this is what it feels like to be blind.